How do you describe someone who was your whole world? How do you put into words how much you love someone who’s no longer there? How do you stop your heart from hurting because there’s a hole there that can’t be filled? You left me too soon. We had so many plans that will go unfulfilled. So many places we wanted to see that won’t be as spectacular without you. You told me you wouldn’t go anywhere without me but you did. You made me promise to take care of myself but how can I when I can barely make it through a day without crying over you?
I know I should celebrate your life and the time we had together but right now I can’t it hurts too much. I can’t sleep at night because there’s no one next to me to keep me warm or to rub my back after a long day at work. There’s no one there to laugh at my stupid jokes or to tell me I’m being silly. I miss your laugh, I miss your smile, I miss you.
I miss your beautiful blue eyes and your smile that could light up a room. I miss your stories that I’ve heard a hundred times before but always acted like I’d never heard before. I miss the way you used to play with my hair. Thirty-two is too young to leave this world.
I know your in a better place now, there’s no more pain, no more lousy hospital food, no one poking you or squeezing you. But where you are I can’t see you except in pictures or in my mind. I tell everyone I’m doing ok but I’m not, I feel like I’m broken inside and nothing can fix it. It was hard enough to lose Mom and Dad but to lose you on top of it damn near killed me. The only reason I didn’t lose my mind the night you died is because I knew that’s not what you would want.
I know one day we’ll be together again and I know that your still with me in spirit but I would do anything to have you next to me for one more day. You will always be my one and only Michelle, you will always be the piece of me that’s missing. I’ll do my best to make you proud of me and I know that I’ll hear about if your not when we’re back together.
Be at peace my sweet angel, I’m so glad I got to tell you one last time that I loved you before you left me. I know you loved me too, you wouldn’t have put up with me otherwise. Just know that I loved you with my whole heart, mind and soul and a piece of me died the day I lost you.
I love you more than you’ll ever know,